Author Archives: Emann Joasil

Nov 12 2010

ZENGLEN MUST PAY FOR ITS INSOLENCE

It is now no secret that Dabenz got voted out unanimously by his bandmates. At unanimity he got voted out, meaning not one member of the band wants him in. A decision like that would make you automatically think that he must have done something really stupid and out of line that could jeopardize the interests of the band, right? No, such is not the case. According to Kompamazine.com reporting the reason for his firing, “They estimate that DABENZ was bringing more negativity to the band ‘ANBA ANBA’ and they claim that ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!” http://kompamagazine.com/kmboard/viewtopic.php?t=32610

Let’s take a moment to analyze the Kompamagazine report. This is a decision taken on the career of an artist on the basis of a baseless claim –Dabenz was bringing more negativity to the band clandestinely. The word clandestinely is exactly what sells them out. Clandestinely or “anba anba” means that they do not have proof that the wrongdoings he has been accused of hold any truth. Where are the facts to corroborate such allegation? How come none of these negativities has ever been known to the press? These guys basically rely on baseless claims circulating through the grapevine to mess with someone’s career.

According to Basekompa.com, all this nonsense about Dabenz bringing more negativity to the band clandestinely is not the true reason behind the firing. The website reported, which the artist later confirmed, that while Dabenz was on stage performing in Haiti at Miche’s Garden with the band, he got embarrassed and humiliated by Brutus. The later, in many instances, ordered the sound engineer to turn Dabenz’s microphone down low so that they do not hear him out in the speakers; he wanted only Kenny’s voice to come out, a way to boycott Dabenz. http://basekompatv.com/forum.html But what could be the reason for the boycott, though?

They wanted to boycott Dabenz because apparently there has been some sort of a power strife going on inside the band. The public is more in tune with him than Kenny, and Brutus was not feeling too keen about that. He wanted to promote Kenny, yet the public has chosen Dabenz. It is like fighting against the will of nature. The public wants something, yet he wants to resist it. Why punishing Dabenz because Kenny is not commercial and hype?

Now, let me talk to these guys for a minute. You guys are the reason why Zenglen, a band that is playing extremely well, is going down. The public does not have faith in you anymore. They realize now that you guys don’t know what you want and have no sense of direction. You throw Dabenz away to sell Kenny to a public that does not even want him. You cannot shove him down the public’s throat. Go look around and find someone else. Kenny cannot do it; he does not have what it takes to be what you guys want him to be for the band –a frontline superstar. Trust me on that.

Dabenz’s home of record is New Jersey. The people here love and see him as their own. They take to heart the way you guys treated him. I think you are going to have to do a lot of PR work to appease the rage of the community here. The word in the streets of New Jersey now is to proceed with operation boycott against Zenglen in the state. I am urging you guys to not come to New Jersey any moment soon, not until the people’s fury is rescinded, for you may be chased out. Don’t say you did not get the message. You are not going to treat the man so unfairly like that to think that everything is cool. M swete nou jwenn nouvel la.

Nov 10 2010

DISIP: BRING SASA BACK!!!!

What are these DISIP guys doing? Are you guys serious? Well, I hope you guys have a VALID reason for dismissing Samille Vanessa Jean-Pierre aka SASA of JP Relations, the young lady who was handling your public relations for you. I don’t really know her, but I can easily depict someone who takes pride in his/her work when I see one; I can easily recognize professionalism and savoir-faire from afar.

Before her in this Kompa business, I did not know any professional PR consultant working tirelessly to transform the business as usual mindset of this landscape. I used to be exposed to nothing but poorly written press releases, unprepared interviews, extrapolation to the max, etc…

I am wondering who else you guys are going to bring on board to replace her. I bet I will not be surprised to see you hiring some mediocre individual, hired on the basis of fanaticism and favoritism, who does not know anything whatsoever in what the duties of a professional PR specialist entail.

This is, indeed, a major setback for you guys. I don’t know what you guys are doing, but you better get your acts together. You need a high speed PR person in your staff to work on the correct ways for your business to relate to the public. You need that for Christ’s sake!!!! You don’t go to sleep and wake up being PR specialist. There is a place called college where these people are prepared to cater to the needs of any challenging and professional market environment.

See, here we go again… that’s why this Kompa business will never get anywhere. For the most part, professionals are not valued in this arena. If you are not an embodiment of ignorance and mediocrity, you have no place in there. Well, again, it is a Haitian thing, why expecting anything different?

GAZZMAN, with all due respect, I swear I thought you were smarter than that. Let me ask you a question, though: are you really serious about this DISIP movement, or is it a hype just to make a quick cash and bounce? Sometimes, for some strange reason, I keep on getting the vibe that you do not have a clear vision as to what you want this venture to be. I hope I am wrong.

Listen to me, whether I am a fan of yours or not is irrelevant for the purpose of this piece. I have no interest whatsoever in your success or failure. But I really want you to know that it will personally bother me seeing a talent of your caliber going wasted because of some misguided decisions.

I know what it feels like to be operating in a bubble where you seem to be out of touch with reality, and that all you have to rely on is your staff. At times, ironically, some of the people in your entourage may not have your best interest. That’s why it is always wise to turn to your fans for advice, for they love you unconditionally and would not wish to see you not making it. So because of this natural bond, they will never give you an advice which will not be for your best interest.

I was taught by my parents to always speak truth to power, so I am telling you boldly that the firing of Sasa is a STUPID decision. I hope it does not take you long to realize that. She is somebody you can consider as an asset to your business.

The majority of these guys you have roving around you acting like they are with you, they are there for their own interests. You are a hot commodity today, you see them around. But the day you are no longer relevant, you will not see them anymore. So don’t be naive and foolish. I do not think it can ever be too late to acknowledge the misstep, retract from it, and reach out to her. That’s the best and smartest thing to do. BRING THAT YOUNG LADY BACK!!!!

Nov 9 2010

Haitian Business and Poor Customer Service: Synonymous?

By VAYOLA PROPHETE

Published: November 09, 2010

Before I get to the crux of this piece, please understand I love my Haitians despite their flaws and imperfections. That’s part of what gives us our distinct character. This piece is being written to shed light on a chronic and pervasive issue in the Haitian business community. To be quite honest, this piece could extend to also incorporate the entire Black community, but I’ll focus on our people for now.

I’m a chronic bootlegger. If I can download it for free, I will. Hey, there’s no shame in my game. Times are hard. The avenue with which to download anything I am looking for is easily accessible and super convenient. For some reason, though, I decided to support the Haitian music industry (HMI) by purchasing a few Haitian CDs. I took it a step further and decided to order from a Haitian website: everythinghaitian.com (EVH). I’ve been on the site before. I’ve even made purchases before. I had an issue in the past, but it was resolved; I thought nothing of it. I figured I’d give EVH another chance. I mean they are Haitian, so why not, right?

So I made my purchase back on September 20, 2010. I spent a little less than $45 on this site, which was debited from my account the very next day. I received two receipts immediately. That was new! I was excited that from the last time I made a purchase, a few things had changed for the better. I figured by the end of September -early October the latest- I’d be blasting my Kompa. Boy was I wrong!

Today is November 9, 2010 and I still haven’t received my CDs. Attempts made at contacting someone from the company has been met with silence. The only form of contact available is e-mail, which is also new. At least I had a phone number to call to speak to an actual person last time. I’m fairly certain that e-mail account was set up to avoid having to speak to customers. Better yet, is anyone actually monitoring it?

I’ll give another example. When I’m feeling too lazy to cook, I’d order from a Haitian restaurant. When you call in, you’re greeted with attitude from whoever is on the other end of the line. The specials are never listed over the phone; the wait for the food is exorbitantly long, and a simple “Thank you! Please come again!” is never uttered. God forbid you go to the restaurant to eat. It’s very likely you’ll leave before being served. Between the inefficiency in the kitchen, rude waiters/waitresses, and the total disregard of your presence in the establishment, most people will leave with their money in tow!

Basic customer service skills are necessary to sustain any business, especially when contact with the consumer will be made regularly. A greeting, a smile, and a genuine effort to be of service go a long way in assuring the customer that their hard-earned dollars are appreciated. Which begs the question, why then is it so hard for Haitian businesses to adapt to such a customer service model? Don’t get me wrong. Not every single Haitian business out there has poor customer service, but it seems as though there’s a majority that do and that’s a HUGE issue if they are to be financially viable in this economy.

So here’s my overarching question: how do I support a business that obviously doesn’t value me as a customer? I can answer it: I DON’T!!! I take my business (and MONEY!!!) elsewhere. If enough customers follow my lead, there won’t be any Haitian businesses left standing. That would be a shame, indeed!

A quick word of advice to current and future Haitian business owners: if you want customers, you have to learn to appreciate them while servicing their needs to the best of your ability. Learn what it means to provide superior customer service and make that a practicing standard in your business. Relying on Haitian camaraderie to get by is simply not going to cut it! Haitian or not, my money goes to the person(s) that is/are trying to make me happy as I spend it. If you happen to be Haitian, awesome! If not, your loss. Get yourselves together and I guarantee your returns on investment and profit margins will increase exponentially!

Thanks for reading!

Nov 7 2010

WAS JESUS A SEXIST BY CONFORMITY?

Was Jesus a sexist by conformity, or did he have deep-rooted hidden issues with women? I personally have problems with his silence on and total disregard of women’s rights.

It is no secret that the role of women in his society was very limited to domestic obligations/duties and submission to a very patriarchal society. Women were treated as second class citizens, and they were subject to all kinds of physical and psychological abuses from their male counterparts. Yet, nowhere in his ministry has it been reported of his advocacy specifically for women’s rights. He addressed every single issue -taxation, law and order, governance, etc… -affecting his society, except that human relations glitch.

Also, how come his disciples, his pals or members of his immediate entourage were all men? That could not be a random misstep or a rare, simple and exceptional coincidence. What could it be exactly? Were the women not good enough to be in his close circle? What key role if any did women play in his ministry anyway?

I think the selection-elimination process by which he proceeded to select his disciples has got to be discriminatory or prejudicial. That was a well-thought-out decision to conform to the norms of his time. In other words, the decision to ostracize the women was not a simple and isolated coincidence.

I know some of you are going to use the storyline of the woman prostitute whose life he had spared from the people who wanted to stone her to death for violating an established societal law against overt and covert prostitution to rebut. Well, let me say to you that he did not defend her rights, which had never existed in and been recognized by her society to begin with. Rather, he wanted to pinpoint the hypocrisy that existed in the people of his time.

Maybe he was not an overt sexist, but he was a conformist who went silent on the ways women were being treated. The problems women were facing then are basically the same as the ones they are facing in today’s society. If he was alive today, how would he address unfair treatments of women in our society?

Nov 5 2010

WE NEED TO ELIMINATE PUBLIC EDUCATION IN HAITI

This is a public policy matter, and I do expect many to disagree with me. Public education in Haiti needs a total reshuffling; it must be incorporated in a comprehensive plan to reform our economy. We cannot be talking about reforming the economy if we do not address the problems with our education.

We need a new system of education to prepare our kids to compete for the jobs of tomorrow at home and abroad.

Public education is a total failure in Haiti, and things will not get better if we do not change course. We need to take government out of the business of educating our kids and let the private sector take over.

Is Haiti a socialist or a capitalist state? Maybe we need to be clear on the type of economic system we have and the type we really need for Haiti. I am a big proponent of capitalism, for it does make sense to me. Maybe that’s what we need for Haiti. Right now, whether you want to agree with me or not, we have a socialist state; government controls almost everything.  

Before we get further in this, let’s take a moment to explain what the job of government should be in a capitalistic economy.

The role of government in a capitalistic economy is NOT to create jobs and compete against the private sector. It is, rather, to enact policies that would encourage private sector jobs. It should work to strengthen the private sector, and the two must work hand in hand to get things to work for the betterment of our society. So needless to say, we need a strong private sector.

In Haiti, government is the biggest competitor we have in the market, preventing the economy from expanding because it stalls competition. It should not be this way. Government is not to compete against the private sector. It is to set the path for the private sector to walk on.
 
I propose the elimination of all the public schools or state-funded institutions of learning and let the private sector take over them. As we have them right now, they are ineffective and represent a symbol of failure because of a lack of competition within the sector of government. We need to get rid of that.

Government should not be in the business of opening schools. It needs to allow the economically disfavored students to attend private schools or the school of their choosing by making grants and scholarships available to them. Doing so will create a market of schools for them to choose from. Giving them the ability to choose the school of their liking will empower them, and that will fuel the competition needed to get the system to work.

If competition is the engine that gets the economy to move, choice is the ignition that gets it to crank up. When government gets in the game, competition is stalled; the economy automatically stops expanding. On the other hand, when you have the players in the private sector competing against one another, it is good for competition in that it results in quality production or quality education for the students. In such a competitive climate, only the best schools will stand. The subpar or mediocre ones will have to close their doors because they won’t be able to sustain the competitive wave. That’s the phenomenon of the “invisible hand” Adam Smith, the Father of Capitalism, talked about in his masterpiece entitled An Inquiry into the Nature and Causes of the Wealth of Nations.    

In conclusion, we need to revamp the system of education in Haiti by allowing the private sector to assume its total control. The government should not be in the business of opening and managing schools. It should be there to subvention the economically disadvantaged students by providing them with grants and scholarships to attend the school of their choosing. Such a strategy will automatically fuel competition within the system, which, in turn, will produce the best educated kids to contribute in the economic and social development of their society.

Nov 2 2010

PLAY POLITICS WITH THE WOMAN’S HEART

Politics and courtship are basically the same –winning the approval of an electorate or the heart of a woman. You have got to have a message. Do not embarrass yourself standing before an audience and not having a message to deliver. It is all about articulating that message in such a way to make your constituents or her fall for you. It may sound easy, but it is not. It requires skills –charisma, articulation or delivery style, humor, etiquette or protocol, etc… Those are the types of skills you acquire as you go, and you develop them.

In politics as in courtship, the goal is to win the heart, nothing less and nothing more. GO FOR THE HEART!!

First, you need to know or have a good grasp of the issues she is interested in so that you can make your case that you are the best candidate to make her dreams come true. It is all about telling her what she wants to hear in a futuristic perspective. If you do not know the life issues (her goals, her aspirations, her likes and dislikes, etc…) she is interested in, how can you articulate a winning message? Otherwise, you are setting yourself for failure. You have got to do your homework if you really want to win her vote or her heart.

Just like the American electorate, when it comes to courtship, women don’t think with their brains; they think with their hearts. That’s why you often hear the sayings “love is blind” and “the insanity of love.”

Gore lost the presidency in America to Bush not because the latter was the best and brightest, not because he had the best plan to move the country forward, but rather because he was “likable.” If the people were using their minds as opposed to their hearts, Gore would have been president; the country would have been in a much better shape than it is today.

In politics as in courtship, it is all about the message. But you can have the best message in the book, if you lack the charisma and the delivery style, you will not be as effective of a winner as you should.

Charisma is the skill that enables you to galvanize your audience, to make their jaws drop, to make them go gaga. It is the “too good to be true” phenomenon. You have to figure out how to do that, how to get her attention. That’s where the skill of charisma comes into play. You cannot win this type of emotional battle if you cannot win the heart.

Also, always fight the good battles –the ones that are winnable and worth fighting for. In other words, if you are willing to die for it, fight for it. By the same token, not all battles are worth fighting for. The same goes for women. Not all women are worth going after. Don’t waste your time. Go after the women with the baggage.

Now, I just used a very subjective terminology, and I am not going to define baggage for you. It is a very subjective terminology in that what I consider to be baggage may not be so to you. The best way to put it is to tell you to go after the women that represent your interests and value the things that you value. If education and a great career are the things that you value and she is the embodiment of those elements, go for it.

Well, I am going to end this by saying one thing: put your everything where your passion is. If you are passionate about that woman, that’s your motivation right there. And motivation is the drive that will get you to excel beyond your expectations. Remember, everything starts with having a winning message, which must reflect the woman’s interests and be articulated in a charismatic way. Do not waste your ammunitions and energy chasing worthless birds. Save them for the toughest and most challenging ones. I am out…

Nov 2 2010

CONDITIONS FOR A NEW AND BETTER HAITI

Being a nation with no previous democratic experience in our two centuries of existence, in terms of technicality, we Haitians are not doing too bad in our handling of our democracy. We have a lot of work to do, but we are on the right path.

Democracy is an ongoing process. Therefore, we must never stop growing, and we certainly must never stop strengthening our institutions if we want to enjoy the beauty of a strong democracy in Haiti.

The institution of democracy is not really a component of Haiti’s problems, since most Haitians favor a democratic Haiti embedded in these two basic principles: freedom of expression and freedom of choice. What we really need to do going forward is to civically educate the people on how to play the game of democracy with a winning state of mind. And the way you achieve that is by teaching them the rules of the game and how to apply them in their daily lives.

I am convinced that our problems are both political and economical. So fixing them requires of us all to be bold in our approaches.

By now, regardless our ideological differences, we all can agree on the fact that we have a vacuum of leadership in our country. In fact, you do not need to take my word for it. Just take a look at the way the aftermath of the earthquake has been managed. The so-called recovery plan they crafted along with the international community is an embarrassment.

Leadership and mediocrity/incompetence are mutually exclusive. It is impossible to get commonsense and proactive leadership out of dumbfoundedness, a trait which only incompetence and mediocrity nurture.

The solution to that aspect of the country’s problems is in the hands of the Haitian people, not those of the international community. We, the people of Haiti, need to break ties with mediocrity; it has proven time and time again to be the opposite force preventing us from progressing forward.

Solving the leadership problem will not happen overnight; it will take time. But we must keep in mind that we cannot be having the same failed politicians on the wheel leading the nation and expecting different results. Their failure has contributed to what Haiti has become today. So we need a new generation of leaders to emerge from the rubble of the disaster to send these “rat do kale” politicians occupying the country’s political landscape for over a quarter of a century to retirement. We need to retire their old, archaic and obsolete ways and replace them with the freshness of ideas emanating from a new class of leaders. We have no control over time, but we do have control over who we are going to choose to represent us and speak on our behalf.

On the economic front, in terms of economic wellbeing, Haiti was, prior to January the 12th, already a “failed” state. The earthquake did nothing but worsening the situation.

The country was the way it was mainly because of the financial or monetary conditions imposed upon it by the major international financial institutions -World Bank, IMF, etc. -dominated for the most part by the United States. If the US really cares and wants to help us to rebuild our nation, they need to start with addressing the evil manners the country has been dealt with by these international financial organizations. Otherwise, any effort to rebuild the country will be vainly undertaken.

In conclusion, we must not believe in the fallacy that the international community has our best interests. It would be foolish to have that in mind. They have their own agenda, which always conflicts with ours. The destiny of our nation lies in our hands. If the international community is really serious about building a strong partnership to help us rebuild our country, they need to be honest about it and stop playing games. In whatever capacity they want to help us, the approach must be systematic and comprehensive, meaning it must not be limited to the infrastructural aspect of the problem. It needs to go beyond that -it needs to touch on the way the country has been treated by the international financial organizations. Until they do that, any reconstruction effort will be a waste of time, money and resources.

Oct 28 2010

SOCIO-ECONOMICS: A COMMUNITY OUTLOOK FACTOR

If you drive through any suburb of New Jersey, you could barely see a liquor store, a fast food restaurant or a church on your way. Yet, in the economically disfavored cities (i.e., East Orange, Orange, Irvington, Newark, etc…), all you see on every block are liquor stores, fast food restaurants (McDonald, Burger King, Wendy’s, Checkers, Popeyes, Chinese, etc…) and churches. And I truly believe it is like that in most, if not all, of the cities across the country. Trust me, there is a reason for that.

When in nursing school I was studying Community Health Nursing at the University of Medicine and Dentistry of New Jersey, I was extremely disturbed by this observation. As part of our final grade, we were to team up with a partner to work on a community health research. My partner and I were assigned to conduct a windshield survey in the city of East Orange to depict the socio-economic realities the citizens in that city were facing and how they (those realities) were impacting lives.

Windshield surveys are a form of information gathering mechanism, involving making direct visual observations of a neighborhood or community while driving. These types of surveys are quite an inexpensive, time-efficient approach to assess the social environment of a community. They can even be conducted on foot in the event that a vehicle is not available or practicable.

The purpose of the windshield survey my partner and I conducted was to gain a better understanding of the city of East Orange’s social environment in terms of its boundaries, housing conditions, use of open spaces, shopping areas, schools, religious facilities, human services (such as hospitals and physician offices), modes of transportation, protective services (such as fire and police stations), and the overall neighborhood life.

We were working closely with the health officials at the East Orange Public Health Department to retrieve and analyze health-related policies, prevalent diseases and statistical data. It was a very insightful research study, which was worth conducted.

Many may be asking why you only find the McDonalds, the Burger Kings, etc… in these economically challenged neighborhoods. Well, first of all, you cannot blame the city officials; they do not have control over that. It is pure economics –supply and demand. Why supplying a good or service to a population that does not have the financial or purchasing leverage to afford it? In other words, what is the sense for a fancy restaurant owner selling healthy food to come open a branch in a neighborhood where the people cannot afford to buy the exquisite meals? That would be really stupid, especially when we all know that business people are in business not for sympathy but for the purpose of making money.

What explanation do I have for the presence of the liquor stores and the churches in those neighborhoods? It is so because there is a demand for them. Otherwise, they would have not been there. Most of the people that live in poverty cling to their drugs to help them forget about the stressful lives they are living and their religion to give them a sense of hope. Do the people in the suburbs consume alcohol and honor their religion? Yes, they do, but demand is everything.

Could the city officials implement policies to discourage these businesses from opening shop in their neighborhoods? Well, that would be economically stupid on their parts, especially when we know the level of education of their constituents only equip them for these kinds of jobs. If they (these jobs) were to be pushed away, then what would happen to employment opportunities and tax revenues which the city governments desperately need to run their operations? So it is a vicious circle, which can only be broken and reversed (on a long-term basis) through a drastic agenda of social reforms with emphasis on investing in the people’s education to increase their socio-economic worth.

Oct 27 2010

CHARACTER ASSASSINATION IS NOT A CRIME

Successful politicians do not only know how well to articulate their plans to their constituents, but also how best to assassinate the character of their opponents. How do you assassinate someone’s character? You assassinate someone’s character by using their vulnerabilities to convince the electorate to believe that the person is UNFIT for the position. You don’t know about your opponents’ character flaws by looking and smiling at them. You have to dig and unearth the stinky corpses.   

Here in the United States, we see nothing but that. Character assassination is the essence of American politics. Do not take my words for it. All you have to do is to take a few minutes of your time to watch a few political ads. A very slim portion of them is dedicated to introducing and positioning the candidates. For the most part, they are attack ads, and their sole purpose is to assassinate the character of the challenger.

In the Haitian political landscape, the politicians do not create or raise controversies, which is probably the reason why I have found it to be overtly boring. I barely see a political advertisement introducing a candidate, let alone an attack one. The ones I have come in contact with only tell the electorate what the candidate’s identification number is and where to make the check mark to vote him/her.

These Haitian politicians do not even talk about themselves in the ads; they worry more about putting the illiterate and hungry masses in the streets playing RARA POLITICS. I have seen a few candidates doing this crap, which I think is embarrassing, disparaging, condescending, demeaning, low and outdated.  

Anyhow, let’s go back to the topic. As I was saying, character assassination is the best way to fight political battles. You do not win these kinds of battles simply by presenting and positioning yourself; you do by assassinating the character of your opponents.

Have you ever asked yourself what had stopped Marc Bazin, the leader of the MIDH, from winning the 1990 presidential election in Haiti? That man was unstoppable. He had the persona, the savviness and the money to finance and run a well-structured campaign. But what he failed to realize was that money alone does not win elections. You need to be presenting yourself and your agenda and attacking your opponents. The strategy for his defeat was perfectly crafted that he was politically dead before the news even got to him.

How did his character get assassinated? The Haitian left painted him as an emissary of Washington. That’s exactly what they did, and before you know it, he was powerless with all the money he had.

The framing of the leader of the MIDH as Washington’s emissary worked perfectly because the public sentiment at the time was VERY antagonistic towards Washington. And the left did not spend a dime in presenting their candidate, Jean Bertand Aristide, who had just been relieved of his priesthood duty by Vatican for his revolutionary and leftist ideology of liberation theology. Aristide, as popular and powerful as he was, did not need any introduction to the political scene. With only a few months of campaigning, he could topple Bazin’s chance to win the presidency.  

Other politicians got eliminated from the scene simply by being labeled the M word –MAKOUT. Coming from the brutal dictatorship regime of the Duvalier, the people were highly repulsive of anyone having ties or acquaintances with the regime. So if you are a candidate, once you are framed as a TONTON MAKOUT, the ceremony for your political funeral is inevitable.

In conclusion, character assassination is a great strategy of battle which politicians use to annihilate their challenger. It works wonders. Politics is not supposed to be fair. How could you be fair in playing a game which must be won psychologically? Before you win in the polls, you must win in the minds of the people. So politicians should not be spending money in just presenting themselves and their agendas to the electorate; they should also work just as hard to assassinate the character of their opponents. It is despicable to see in this 21st century these Haitian politicians using the same archaic RARA POLITICS as political tool to get the attention of the electorate. Character assassination is not a punishable offense, so use it.

Oct 25 2010

IRRESPONSIBLE SEX & SINGLE PARENTHOOD

We cannot change society’s sentiments or perceptions of women having kids out of wedlock. Yes, it is not nice and kind for any woman to be looked down upon just because she has kids outside the realm of marriage. But what can you do? You cannot change that. What you can change, however, is your approach to courtship and sex.

Sex ought to be a very serious matter, something that must not be taken lightly. Why having sex with a man who does not see you good enough to be his wife? Please tell me. And when things get complicated and twisted, because a child comes to be added to the equation, you want to hate the man for not wanting to be in your life. You don’t mother his child as a way to keep him or pressure him to marry you. Some women do that, and I think it is very illogical.  

I am not here to be telling you to not be having premarital sex. In fact, you should already know where I stand on that. I encourage you to have responsible premarital sex. If you choose to abstain from having sex until you get married, that’s your choice, and no one should make you feel asocial or like some sort of a strange creature. But if you choose to have casual sex with someone you are not married to, be responsible about it. Enjoy the sexual pleasure there is to enjoy with your sense of reason and responsibility, meaning to do so with someone with the potentials and character to be your husband.

Some of you may argue that marriage is not for you. I can understand that, especially with women these days becoming more independent than ever before. However, from a socio-economic perspective, it is more of an asset or investment to be and stay married than it is a liability, especially when you marry a supportive and responsible man. It is not sweet to be working making ends meet. It is not sweet to be stressing yourself over where the money for next month rent is coming from. Keep in mind that 1 income + 1 income = 2 incomes, not zero income.

From a social perspective, it does elevate the image of the woman when she is married. Society looks at you differently. Yes, I understand you are not living your life for people, but that’s the way it is. Can you change that? Well, if you can, go right ahead make it happen. And when/if you do, please do inform me so I could help you spread the word.

Finally, we have too many single mothers out there struggling living egregiously. That is happening because of a choice they had made, for (for the most part) the man/men did not tie their hands and rape them. They had consensual sex with them. Hear me out, ladies: It is not smart to be sleeping with any man just because he has a penis for you to explore. Just know that actions have consequences. Have sex with someone who can be a plus to your life, not a burdensome liability. Use your brain to figure out what tends to work for YOU. No one should tell you how to live your life. However, when things go wrong, your problems, whether you want to agree with it or not, will become other people’s issues. So enjoy your sex life in a smart, responsible and safe manner.